Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Cobain's Sarcoma

Why does the idea of heroin addiction affect me so strongly?  I don’t really know.  I mean, there are people in my family with cancer, too, but somehow that doesn’t get to me in the same way.

Possibly it’s because I have so much invested, philosophically and emotionally, in the idea of freedom, and heroin goes in and attacks the will like almost nothing else.  I tried a while ago to figure out whether “cancer of the will” was a phrase that people use to describe addiction.  It seemed like the answer was “yes, but not widely”, so I don’t know if I heard/read it or came up with it myself.  But it seems apt to me.  Heroin addiction isn’t an external force overpowering the will, but a malignancy of the will itself.  How do you fight something like that?

Fuck heroin.  It makes me so sad and so angry.

And now here are a few songs about heroin, some of which sometimes make me cry…